I
wonder why Jesus asked him that silly question.
Here’s
the story. One day, Jesus saw a paralyzed man lying near the
pool of Bethesda. The guy has been paralyzed for 38 years. Jesus
asked him, “Would
you like to get well?” (Read
the full story in John 5:1-9)
I
find that…uh, rather strange.
Why
ask that question?
The
paralyzed man could have answered, “Helloooo… Is the sun
hot? Of course I want to get well. Goodness, are you blind,
Jesus? Isn’t it pretty obvious? When you were a kid, I
was already lying here. Before you were born, I was already
lying here. I’ve been stuck here for 38 years. My gosh,
why wouldn’t I want to get well?”
But
Jesus asked that question because he knew human nature.
Let
me shock you: Suffering
people are ambivalent. Torn. Confused. Conflicted. Two-minded.
Many
sick people aren’t sure if they want to get well. Many poor
people aren’t sure that they want to get rich. Many
problematic people aren’t sure that they want all their problems to
be solved. Many abused wives aren’t sure if they want to get
rid of their abusive husbands.
It’s
crazy, but true.
How
do you know if someone is ambivalent? If he gives excuses for
not doing what he’s supposed to be doing.
That’s
what the paralyzed guy did. He said, “I
can’t, sir, for I have no one to put me into the pool when the
water bubbles up. Someone else always gets there ahead of me.” (The
people there believed that the pool was miraculous.)
Believe
me, I’ve heard the line, “I can’t…” a million times
already. I hear it from suffering people who seemingly want
to get out of their suffering—but don’t. After saying “I
can’t…” they’ll give their excuses.
Let
me give you one example…
“I
Can’t Because…”
I’ve
talked to a number of jobless people. Here are the actual
statements I heard from them…
o “I
can’t find a job because there are so many others looking for a
job.”
o “I
can’t find a job because I don’t know anyone…”
o “I
can’t find a job because I don’t know how to make a bio-data.”
o “I
can’t find a job because I have no one to accompany me.”
o “I
can’t find a job because it’s so hot these days and I’m
allergic to the heat.”
o “I
can’t find a job because I lost my cellphone.”
o “I
can’t find a job because I don’t have anything nice to wear.”
I
repeat—Excuses are simply signs that they’re
ambivalent. Bottomline, they don’t want a job. At least,
they don’t want a job bad
enough.
Here’s
what I learned in life: If
you want something bad enough, nothing much can stop you. Not
a million other job applicants. Not the heat. Not the lack of a
companion. Not the lack of a cellphone. Not the lack of
nice clothes.
Why
are people ambivalent?
Two
reasons…
Two
Reasons For Ambivalence
This
seems insane—when a suffering person is not sure if he really wants
to get out of his suffering or not.
But
there are 2 real reasons for this ambivalence…
1.
Suffering Has Become Your Identity
The
paralyzed man had been paralyzed for 38 years. That’s a pretty
long time. He saw himself as paralyzed. I bet he couldn’t
see himself in any other way—until Jesus came along.
For
many people, their suffering becomes their Safe Zone. They’ve
gotten used to the pain. And what is familiar is safe—no
matter how painful that situation is.
Listen
to this statement from author Robin Sharma. The
most dangerous place is your safe zone. If
you want growth in your life, you have to get out of your safe
zone. Because your safe zone is the place for dead people.
At
the root of all ambivalence is Fear. What kind of fear? The
fear of the unknown.
No
matter how painful suffering is, at least we’re familiar with
it. That suffering has become our identity. And once
there’s an opportunity to get out of suffering, fear of the unknown
grips our heart. Result? We become ambivalent.
When
I converse with the poor in slum areas, I cannot count the number of
times I’ll hear these words, “I’m poor”; “We’re poor”;
“My family is poor”… It’s a common refrain you’ll hear
again and again.
Poverty
has become their identity.
Many
of them have gotten so used to it, if you give them an opportunity to
leave poverty, they’ll not take it. Because they’re afraid
at what will happen to them if they lose their identity of poverty.
Here’s
my big question to you: What
problem has become your identity? The
man’s paralysis was his identity. So much so that his mat
became his master. His problem ruled his life. His mat
controlled him, not the other way around.
What
is your Mat?
Jesus
said, “Stand up and pick up your mat.” Don’t let that
problem control you. Take control of your problem! Take
charge of that sickness. Take charge of that debt. Take
charge of that situation. Stand up!
Here’s
the second reason for ambivalence…
2.
Suffering Has Become Your Income
Problems
have side
benefits. Always.
For
the paralyzed man, his paralysis was the reason why he could earn a
living as a BEGGAR. For 38 years, his paralysis put food on the
table. No wonder Jesus asked him, “Do you want to get
well?” In other words, Jesus was asking, “Hey Buddy, if you
get well, you’re going to lose your income. You’ll have to
change your career. Are you sure you want this?”
This
is a fact. We derive all sorts of income from our problems, not
necessarily financial.
I
met a woman who was sick with hypertension, diabetes, allergies, and
heart disease. And every year, she’d have a new sickness. She
was going to different doctors almost every week, sometimes two or
three times a week, for 12 long years.
After
talking to her, I realized she was such a lonely person. She had
no real family around her. And here’s my suspicion: She
likes getting sick. The
only time someone talks to her, or listens to her, or holds her hand,
or touches her arm, is when she is sick. Her 6 doctors, all the
nurses, and the clinics’ receptionists have become her small
community.
Believe
me, she’ll never get well. Unless she finds an
“income-replacement”.
Here’s
my question to you: What
income do you get from your suffering? Identify
your income. And identity your “income-replacement”. If
you don’t, you’ll always have ambivalence. Fear of the
unknown will always hold you back.
Today,
I’d want to give you the three steps to get out of your paralysis,
three steps to get out of your suffering…
3
Things To Do To Get Out Of Suffering
Are
you paralyzed by your problem now?
There’s
hope. You can get of your paralysis. You can pick up your
mat and walk.
Here’s
how…
1.
Remove Ambivalence
Why
do I encourage people to pray for their dreams daily?
Here’s
why: Because Abundance
is attracted to Clarity.
Not
Ambivalence.
You
need to be very clear with what you want. Let the question of
Jesus reverberate in your heart. He asks you, “Do you really
want to get well? Do you really want to get out of your
suffering? What do you really, really, REALLY want?”
Abundance
Will Give Her Heart To
Someone
Who Really Wants Her
Abundance
is like a beautiful woman, waiting for the right suitor to win her
heart.
Mister
Ambivalence shows up at her doorstep, but looks terrible. He’s
wearing an old pair of shorts and an ugly shirt. And he
smells. He hasn’t taken a bath for a week. It’s clear
he hasn’t come to court her.
When
Lady Abundance opens the door, he looks at her and says, “Miss, you
look interesting. I think I
like you. But I really don’t know. You see, I’m in a
complicated relationship with another girl right now. Her name
is Poverty and she’s a real pain in the neck. But I’m not
ready to give her up just yet.”
What
will Lady Abundance do? She’ll tell him, “Bye!” and shut
the door. She’ll drive him away.
And
then Mr. Clarity arrives. He looks dashing in a tie. He
smells fresh. And he has a red rose in his hand. He says to
her, “People told me you were lovely, but gosh, you take my breath
away. This might be too fast, but I have to tell you
what’s in my heart. No, I don’t expect you to answer me
today, or tomorrow, or next week, or next month. It doesn’t
matter. I will wait. But I need to tell you that I will
pursue you with all my heart until the ends of the earth. And I
have to ask this question in Tagalog… Bangin
ka ba?” (Are
you a pit?)
Miss
Abundance asks, “Why?”
“Nahuhulog
ako sa iyo.” (I’m falling for you.)
What
do you think will Miss Abundance do? You can bet she’ll be
more attracted to Mr. Clarity than Mr. Ambivalence.
Do
you want to get out of your suffering? Do you want to get out of
your paralysis?
Remove
ambivalence. Be
unstoppable.
And
you’ll get out of your suffering.
Here’s
the second step…
2.
Restore Authority
The
paralyzed man thought that healing came from the pool. The
superstition was that the first person to jump into the water when it
starts moving would be healed.
So
far, for 38 years, he’s not been healed. Why? First of
all, no one offers to carry him to the pool. Second, he’s
never the first guy to dive in when the water bubbles up.
But
Jesus told him, “Stand
up, pick up your mat, and walk!” In
other words, Jesus said, “Forget the pool. Forget about
waiting for someone to carry you to the pool. You don’t need
the pool. Stop waiting. The power isn’t in the pool. The
power is in you.”
Let
me say that again: The
power is in you!
So
many people look for power elsewhere. They believe that the
solution to their problems depends on someone else.
They
wait for the government to help them. They wait for Mommy and Daddy
to solve their problems. They wait for a friend to rescue
them. They wait for their boss to promote them.
But
unless you understand that the location of the power is within
you—you won’t get out of your suffering.
Jesus
said, I tell
you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain,
‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his
heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for
him. (Mark
11:23)
You
can change the topography of your situation. God has given you
the Authority to command the mountain of your problems to move!
When
you believe that the power is within you, you become unstoppable.
And
finally, the third step to get out of suffering…
3.
Repeat Action
Psalms
23 says, Even
though I walk through the valley of darkness, I fear no evil, for you
are with me. (Psalms
23:4)
Face
it. There are many valleys in our lives. Many places of
suffering.
But
I love this Psalm because it says that we don’t stay in the
valley. We don’t sit in the valley. We don’t stand in
the valley. We don’t sulk in the valley…
We
walk through the valley.
I
love the illustration of walking because walking is a repeated
action. Walking is putting one foot in front of the other
foot. If you want to get out of suffering, you have to keep on
doing the right thing again and again until you walk out of the
valley.
Jesus
told the paralyzed man, “Walk.”
For
38 years, this guy has never walked. He was rusty. I can
imagine how clumsy it must have been at the start.
His
toothpick legs were wobbly. Shaky. Unbalanced. People
probably held him up so that he wouldn’t fall. But he took
that first wobbly step. And he took another step. And
another… Until he walked out of his suffering.
To
walk out of your suffering, you have to keep on doing the right thing
again and again.
Are
you jobless right now? Do the right thing again and again until
you walk out of the valley. Keep developing yourself. Keep
training yourself. Keep applying. 10 companies, 20 if
necessary. Don’t stop. Soon, you’ll walk out of
the valley.
Are
you buried in debt? Do the right thing again and again until you
walk out of the valley. Don’t borrow again. Keep paying
your debts. Keep living simply. Don’t stop. Soon,
you’ll walk out of the valley.
Be
Unstoppable
Let
me repeat my big question to you: Are
you unstoppable?
The
reason why you don’t have what you say you want is because you
don’t want it bad enough.
You
say you want a strong relationship with your kids. But do you
want it bad enough, you’ll do anything to make it happen? Like
spending more time with them? Like giving up golf, TV,
computers, games—so you could hang out more with your kids? Do
you want it bad enough that you’re willing to humble yourself
before your kids to ask forgiveness from them?
You
say you want to become wealthy. But do you want it bad
enough? Will you live simply so you can invest every month? Will
you be willing to sell and be rejected? Will you get training? Will
you read the right books, attend the right seminars, and seek out the
right mentors?
You
say you want to be healthy. But do you want it bad enough? Will
you do anything to achieve it? For example, will you eat the
best nutritious food? Will you walk everyday?
Remove
ambivalence.
Be
clear with what you want.
Be
unstoppable.
And
walk out of the valley.
May
your dreams come true,
Bo
Sanchez